Who would you invite to dinner?

“Elitist c*nt”, “Die Bitch”, “self-important, nasty c*nt”, “Rachel the muff-diver”, or so-and-so has a “nice set of cans”.
Heard enough?
Would you invite this person who said all this publicly over to your home for dinner, knowing at any time and with great regularity, this person could spew out these deeply offensive, misogynistic remarks while your wife, daughter, or mother was sitting at the table passing the gravy. Well, the GOP State Party did exactly that on Friday night when they invited Rodger Stone as their keynote speaker at the opening of their state convention. Stone, long standing advisor to Trump, provocateur who has been banned from Fox News, CNN, MSNBC for his vulgar, incendiary rhetoric as quoted above, was the showcase of the evening. And what is worse, a number of State Republican legislators paid $90 dollars a person to endorse and listen to a man who has carved out a reputation to demean women and dismantle civility.
Now much has been said about infringement of first amendment rights, that Robert Stone is entitled to his opinions however offensive and off-putting. But we all know that first amendment rights are limited when a direct threat is posed either to an individual or to a group. The courts have ruled words which would likely make the person whom they are addressing commit an act of violence – fighting words – are a category of speech that is unprotected by the First Amendment. (Chaplinsky v New Hampshire, 315 U.S. 568 (1942). There is no doubt that “c*nt”, “bitch”, “muff-diver”, are not words that we use to compliment the women in our lives and many a fight has been fought, retaliating against those who do chose to use these labels in reference to our wives, mothers, or daughters. Stone’s public use of this offensive rhetoric serves no purpose other than to incite, raise eyebrows, or attract attention. What possible platform is he promoting other than a sexist, demeaning attitude that degrades women. Back in 2008, Stone went so far as to establish the anti-Hillary Clinton 527 group called “Citizens United Not Timid”- emphasizing the acronym by bolding the first letter in each word – C.U.N.T. – just so he could say it publicly. The group’s mission was to “educate the American public about what Hillary Clinton really is.” Although the group is now defunct – the message was clear – any woman, particularly a progressive one who dared to disagree with Stone’s politics, that stands strong, displays leadership, and pursues public office – is reduced to this chauvinistic and disgusting slur. Furthermore, the media outlets such as Fox News, CNN, MSNBC, has banned Stone from appearing on their airwaves because of his incendiary tweets, comments, and posts. And yet, the GOP in Delaware thought it prudent and appropriate to make money off such an “insightful” presenter.
But how do you explain the many women who attended Stone’s speech and praised his message Friday night without batting an eye? Is Stone’s outrageous views not directed at them because they are
conservative or financially supporting Republican values, or are they willing to turn a blind eye under the popular thinking that this is just “locker room talk.” I offer another explanation – internalized sexism. Internalized sexism is defined as the involuntary belief by girls and women that the lies, stereotypes and myths told about girls and women that are promulgated throughout society ARE TRUE. Girls and women, boys and men, hear the sexist messages about women over and over again – messages that women are stupid, weak, passive, not born leaders; that women don’t argue with one another they instead have “cat fights”. God forbid a woman forgets something and happens to be blond then she is simply a “dumb blonde”; women are too emotional, gold-diggers, or just “little ladies.” There are two logical predictable consequences of a lifetime of such exposure: first, boys and men grow to believe that these messages are true and a “fact of life” no different than calling the sky blue, and treat women accordingly. But the second logical consequence which is more damning than the first is that the same messages stick to girls and women who subsequently internalize these standards or expectations and act out these lies and stereotypes to define their identities. We saw this after then candidate Trump was caught on a hot mike referring to women as sex objects and suggesting that “grabbing them by their pussies” was a prize of the victor. Many women, even here in Sussex, including elected female officials, dismissed the remarks as just locker room talk or “boys will be boys.” Are we to believe that men who embrace that kind of mindset or speech only thinks about women as meaningless in the locker room and they would never believe it to be true in board rooms, classrooms, or around the kitchen table? Can men so casually turn it on and off? Apparently not, if one looked at the sold out crowd at Dover Downs on Friday night to hear a man whose claim to fame was to politicize women as inconsequential objects to be dismissed or denied equal status and respect. And what is really ironic, is that the GOP embraced Stone’s epistle on Friday night, and turned around and elected a female vice-chair on Saturday. What might she be thinking or saying to herself– I can’t wait until someone like Stone calls me a “self important, nasty c*nt” the first time someone disagrees with her. I salute any woman that stands tall in public office, but I cringe inside because I know her tenure can become mired by this derogatory rhetoric while she can still remember the applause that Stone received.
My mother, like yours, always taught me that “Tell me who your friends are, and I will tell you who you are.” I was disheartened and frankly demoralized to find out that in my own state’s backyard, the Delaware GOP’s friend is a man that has sensationalized and lined his pockets with this hateful discourse. I hope that the mirror that the GOP holds up to look in doesn’t crack into so many shards as to never be mended again.