Victim Nation

bubble_wrap  Is this what it’s come to?  It seems as though we have become a nation of victims. I am not talking specifically about being the victim of physical violence, nor even emotional violence. Though emotions play heavily into the type of victimhood I am speaking of.

There was a time in America, when people were proud to be tough. To be able to, “take it”.

But, it seems as though we have for the most part moved away from that view of ourselves, and have decided to play the victim card at every turn. It seems that every word uttered is an insult, or an attack against someone, or some group. When did Americans become such wussies?

In our private lives, we find we must guard against saying the wrong thing, that in the work place, could lead to a sexual harassment suit. Dare I say a female, fellow employee, looks nice today? Should I complain that a female worker gets away with murder because she is attractive? Of course not, because women are victims of society, they have been held down by the glass ceiling.

Is it possible, that some women don’t make as much as their male counterparts because they just aren’t as good at what they do? Of course not, it’s because of the male dominated business world, and of course because of the grand conspiracy of male business owners to pay qualified people less based on their gender.

It may just seem easier, to make a class action claim, than to look inward.

We see a similar argument made by the so-called minorities. Though when placed under the umbrella of the word minority, and protected as a whole, they are no longer a minority. Here in America, societal, or systemic racism is a thing of the past. No longer does government have the authority to make decisions based on race. This is not to say that there is no individual racism, or prejudice. There clearly is. But the minority community needs to stand on its own two feet, and recognize this type of individual racism will always be with us, and quit leaning on it as a crutch.

Recently I was having a conversation about religious freedom, and the person stated, for the past eight years in this country, Christians had been under attack. My first question was, why just the last eight years? Though I got no answer, I assume it may have something to do with President Obama, and that individual racism I spoke of. I asked for specific points they felt were attacks on Christians. Again, no answer. It seemed as though this person simply wanted to play the victim card.

“Oh! Poor me the Christian, no body will let me pray, in front of a lot of people, so people will see me praying, and know I am a Christian, who prays, while standing in front of a lot of people.”  

Well it’s just my opinion, but I think they missed quite a bit of the teachings of Jesus. Like the part where he says to “pray in your closet.”

But let us assume there is this nationwide conspiracy to do away with Christianity, to what end I haven’t a clue. But let us assume. Didn’t Jesus tell us in, Luke 21:12, “But before all these, they shall lay their hands on you, and persecute you, delivering you up to the synagogues, and into prisons, being brought before kings and rulers for my name’s sake.”

So, If we are to take the teachings of Jesus to heart, are we not to expect to be persecuted? Should we not be prepared to suffer such? Maybe instead of whining and playing the victim, we should wear the name of Jesus as a badge, and to have the attacks upon us seen as an honor, for if we were not being attacked, we would not be fulfilling the prophesy of Christ.

Then of course, there are the political victims. And let me be clear, there are plenty on all sides of the political spectrum. The victim card is not restricted to only one ideology, or party. Though of course each will tell you they are warriors, and their opposition is the whiny little bitches.

In fact, the political victims may be the worst of all, because they are not crying foul for being attacked over something they have no control of, like their gender, or their race. They are being challenged about their views. Of course they will tell you, if only this party or that party would practice a certain ideology in its purist form, then the entire nation would see the light, and all would be well. All the while building what I call political escape hatches.

This means, while claiming to have all the answers, they have to build an escape hatch to explain why they lose. This can be anything from the , “liberal media bias”, to a “vast right-wing conspiracy”. Some will claim the system is rigged against them, so they have no chance to win. Really? One has to wonder what kind of special fool it takes, to be involved in a system you claim is stacked against you.

I am sure there are so many other sub groups, and types of so-called victims. The LGBT community often plays the victim. If a baker refuses to bake a cake, instead of just finding another baker, we get law suits and grand conspiracies. Again, if there are real systemic, or governmental infringements upon a person’s rights and freedoms, I stand with you, and yes, I have changed my position of gay marriage, I really just don’t care. But don’t force a private business owner to do that which they find distasteful.

Look, I am not saying there is no racism, there is. I am not saying there is no sexism, there is. I am not saying there are not people who go out of their way to be offended by a Christian prayer, just another victim card to be played though. I am not saying there are not people who are consumed with the idea of gay marriage, one might wonder why.

But where does the trouble really begin? Could it be, that when we play the victim card, and demand government to intervene, what we are really doing is forcing government on our fellow citizens in a way we would not want it forced upon ourselves.

If a woman brings a sexual harassment charge against a fellow employee, does she consider what it would be like to have the same done to her? No of course not, because the field is not level.

If a minority claims racism in some setting, do they have to worry about how it would affect their lives to have such a claim leveled at them? No because the playing field is not level.

When a Christian makes the claim that Christianity is under attack in America, do they feel the same way when people talk of banning other religious groups? No, they are blind to the possibility.

As for the political victims, well that is just stupid. Politics is about the debate, it’s about the discussion, it’s about ideas and opinions. It is only when people close their minds to the possibility they might be wrong, and someone else might be right, that they must claim there is a conspiracy to silence them, though they would, in many cases, do the exact same thing.

If government were not involved, in an attempt to level the field, but in reality government makes it worse, then when a woman had a good idea for a business, she could go out and hire all the best women, and pay them whatever they choose. The same for minorities, and yes even whites and men.

And again, politics is the easiest of all. We already have the party system, we group ourselves into clubs and talk about growing. But far too often the purist among us make it impossible. If instead of demanding all must agree one-hundred percent, what if we focused on making the best argument for our case? Instead of claiming victim status, we simply talked to others about what they feel, what they see as the best way to reach mutual goals.

We as a nation are moving further apart as citizens. And we have demanded that government and our leaders force it upon all. What do I care if a company is run by, and only employs black people, as long as theirs is the best product for my money. And what idiot business owner would not sell to someone because they are gay? Why should I care who is eating the cake I baked, as long as the check clears.

We have to stop being the victim, it makes us weak as a people and a nation.

Jesus teaches me to love all as my brothers and sisters. This means blacks, whites, gays, Christians, Muslims and Jews, and yes even Democrats. I am not perfect in this practice, it is hard, and I fail. But if we were to look upon those who disagree with us, those who may hate us, those who would deny us that which we feel is our entitlement, with a bit more understanding, to put ourselves in their place, to wonder what it would feel like to be them for one moment, then maybe we could spread that around the world.

Okay, this was my Kumbaya moment.

P.S., I now fully expect any number of victims to show up here and complain they have been attacked unfairly here.

61 Comments on "Victim Nation"

  1. delacrat says:

    ” Dare I say a female, fellow employee, looks nice today? – Frank

    Hmm… do you hit on the women where you work ?

    And if she “brings a sexual harassment charge” against you, is she “playing the victim card” or standing up for herself.

  2. Frank Knotts says:

    First of all Delacrat, no ladies where I work. But how is a compliment about how someone looks harassment? Standing up against what exactly? Is it harassment if another woman complements how she looks? What if it is a lesbian who makes the complement ? If the straight person files a complaint, are they then guilty of gay bashing?

  3. Pat Fish says:

    Couple of things here. First, quite well-written Frank. Thoughtful.

    I begin with the Christian prayers. I am kind of with you on that because I don’t have a need to pray in public and don’t really understand why others feel the need. Then again I will pray when prayers are called for because it doesn’t offend me that much. But I get the concept.

    But Frank, come on, praying in public is just not quite the same as blowing people up, which the Islamofacists do and it’s perfectly normal not to want stupid murderers around you. Understand I do not have the answers and I am not necessarily proposing banning all Muslims but it’s a problem and it’s not remotely comparable to praying in public.

    As for females….heh. All my life I’ve been felt up by men as if I were their personal feel-up doll. Now go with me here, I am not alone and I wasn’t necessarily all that pretty. But I sure weren’t ugly and I am, and was, quite smart. Back in my day men didn’t much like smart woman.

    Let’s see, this includes my first husband’s father, the VP of my union at AT&T, my BOSS for God’s sake…..and sometimes even men I liked,.

    Though I do not consider myself a mistreated minority, there has been a benefit of making men aware that you need permission to go feeling up a woman, she’s not just yours to feel up because you are a man. I doubt my granddaughter will have to tolerate that which I did in the day when no one stopped these men, least of all me.

    Speaking of granddaughter, well she is just the most beautiful young child, 13, standing at the cross-roads of life, abandoned by her mother but that’s another story. So a week ago we went up to Massachusetts to meet the Fish people, who are NOT related to Kaitlyn. They’re not related to me either; my deceased husband’s family.

    So Matthew Fish is 14, a precocious child, really into politics, says he is going to be President and tells how many years until he is 35 an able to take the job. Since I am a political junkee I quite enjoy this young man’s company and, heh, his voice just changed and now he sounds like a country-western singer.

    Well Matthew’s going to need a First Lady, no? And who but my beautiful granddaughter, who too knows a thing about politics?

    Aw, I don’t know what’s going to happen but when Kaitlyn said she wants to join the STEM project at school….STEM standing fo Science,, technology, engineering and Math…..heh. Me, the big woman’s libber of yore, instructed Kaitlyn to just over in the corner and be beautiful. STEM? All she does is dance from morning to night!

    Of course it’s a joke. So laugh.

  4. Bluebolt says:

    KNOTTS is a victim of his own BS.

  5. Maya says:

    Majority of women enjoy and appreciate compliments AND we love having the door held open for us. Majority of woman who actually go as far as to report a sexual harassment situation is because something has gone way further than a nice compliment. Are there idiot, pathological women who lie and try to use sexual harassment to seek revenge of sorts? Of course. But that is not the majority. Ask a woman who has experienced severe sexual harassment or rape and they will tell you of the shaming and doubt put on them by some by coming forward. There are a lot of social consequences women experience when they come forward to report such extreme behaviors, so coming forward is not an easy thing to do. Even in a work situation where there are laws to protect employees, supervisors and fellow employees can view you differently when you report harassment. So that is why majority of women who come forward do so because the behavior has gotten to a point where it is way beyond nice compliments.

  6. Rick says:

    Hmm… do you hit on the women where you work ?

    Office relationships are quite common. Of course, there is. such a thing as subtlety. And if a woman makes it obvious that she isn’t interested, you leave her alone.

    If a man is sitting at a desk, and a woman leans over and purposely shows her boobs every chance she gets, is that harassment or flirtation?

    Delacrat is your prototypical “liberal” (actually, lockstep conformist) weenie. Who else would make a comment so detached from reality and so typical of the hypersensitive leftist with their faux hurt feelings over what, to a normal person, would be a simple compliment.

    It is normal for men and women to be attracted to each other- and this includes at the workplace. That said, “no” means no.

  7. mouse says:

    Yesterday, these 2 lesbians in Rehoboth told me I have nice hair… I’m filing a complaint

  8. mouse says:

    They even touched me. How am I not a victim on several levels here? They were women but they surely would have rejected me if I had made advances, yet they could complement and touch me with impunity. This is a total outrage. I demand victim status! I’m mad as hell and I’m not taking it anymore. .

  9. delacrat says:

    Rick,

    Roger Ailes would agree with you.

  10. Maya says:

    Rick, You do know that just because a woman is dressed where you can see her cleavage does not mean she is flirting with you, right? Also you realize that just because a women twists or turns or bends over and you get a visual of something extra does not mean that was meant for you either, right? Just checking here because one part of your comment is a bit confusing.

  11. Honi Soit says:

    @Rick: “If a man is sitting at a desk, and a woman leans over and purposely shows her boobs every chance she gets, is that harassment or flirtation?”

    If she shows her boobs in the workplace, then it could well be grounds for immediate dismissal with cause. Depends, I suppose, on the workplace. If she works as an exotic dancer, then I’d give her a pass. Especially if her name is Bambi or Texxxas.

  12. Andy Lynch says:

    Maya, Those are GREAT points — and I appreciate this discussion. You are exactly right, it DOESN’T mean those things (not flirting, not meant for him to see) … but help me here- if one of those two things does happen, what DOES it mean?

  13. Maya says:

    Andy sometimes it just means there was a wardrobe malfunction. Or sometimes cleavage is simply unavoidable for large chested women when they want to wear that fashionable dress or shirt. Unless they wear a turtle neck all the time, cleavage can be a regular thing. I don’t think I’m saying anything profound here.

  14. Frank Knotts says:

    I just want to be on the record, I am pro-cleavage 😁

  15. Maya says:

    Frank, then I guess you will not be reporting a woman to HR for sexual harassment because you are offended by her cleavage showing. Im sure big busted women everywhere appreciate your understanding.

  16. Rick says:

    Rick, You do know that just because a woman is dressed where you can see her cleavage does not mean she is flirting with you, right? Also you realize that just because a women twists or turns or bends over and you get a visual of something extra does not mean that was meant for you either, right? Just checking…

    You do know that there are many sexually aggressive women in the world, right? And when these women are interested, they make it rather obvious. You k is that, right? It’s not rocket science.

    As I said, “no” means no. Conversely, “yes” means yes.

  17. Maya says:

    Rick, I asked the question because your example was simply a women leaning over. Some men take something suttle as an invitation to begin very detailed sexual comments. Glad to know you are not one of those men. Believe me when I say there are men who see an attractive women who is dressed in a sexy manner and they take it as an invitation to go beyond “you look pretty today” or “do you want to go out sometime” and go further into descriptions of great sexual detail that women should not have to combat in a work setting. I am grateful for work place rules so I can go to work and not hear from my coworker how they dreamt about having sex with me the previous night with detail. And yes that has happened and similar sexual detailed comments on more than one occasion from more than one man in my work career. This is more common than some men think. For the record women should not be going so far sexually to make men uncomfortable in a work place either. I’d back up any man for reporting a women for sexual harassment if their actions went too far as well.

  18. mouse says:

    Women choose the mate in human culture. A man has to be patient, politely interetsed and hope to be chosen. Admittedly, a large busted woman in a turtle neck and skirt can incite weaker men to impulse. It’s always a losing stratage to give into it though.

  19. Frank Knotts says:

    Maya, I appreciate small breasted women as well. But since you said above, “an attractive women who is dressed in a sexy manner”, I have to ask, if a woman dressed in a “sexy” manner, why should she be surprised by a sexual response?
    Is she not responsible for beginning the sexual interaction?

  20. Frank Knotts says:

    Double standards are not equality.

  21. Maya says:

    a man can view a woman in a suit or her work out clothes as sexy. It’s not an invitation for anyone to be sexually aggressive and that includes sexually explicit language. A woman has a right in our society to dress how she wants without fear of being grabbed or sexually harassed. I’m not talking about compliments here Frank. Are you really saying that if a woman purposely dresses in a sexy manner she deserves to be sexually harassed? with that way of thinking then i guess the USA Olympic volleyball female athletes are inviting sexually explicit language because they wear bikinis at work. Oh I guess then your daughter looking sexy in her cute sundress is asking for it when that old man approaches her and tells her he wants to take her in the back seat of his truck. When she comes home crying make sure you tell her it’s HER fault for dressing too sexy.

  22. Frank Knotts says:

    Maya, certainly not. I am merely playing out the string you started when you used the word sexy. Even a person with your viewpoint on the issue chose the word sexy, root word “sex”, words mean things. You could have said dressed provocatively, or dressed in a certain way, but you chose sexy.
    Of course there is no way to know what is in a woman’s mind when she got dressed in the morning, was she going for “sexy”? Or just thought she looked nice?
    In being provocative myself as devils advocate, at what point is an equal player in the game accountable for mixed messages?
    Let’s say two co-workers have been flirting back and forth for some time, and at some point the one takes it to another level by suggesting something more. The other person is not interested. Is this harassment at this point? Are they both not equally responsible for it reaching this stage?
    As for my daughter, when she was younger her mother and I controlled what she wore as parents should. Now that she is an adult she makes good choices still. I also long ago had the discussion about how to handle unwanted advances. Though she may face assault charges😁

  23. Maya says:

    I Did not realize the word “sexy” was so controversial. Your scenario of the flirting is a behavior and action between two people. That’s different from a woman who simply dressed sexy without any other sexual or intimate behavior or advances made toward a man. Let’s face it, attractive people look sexy in most anything they wear. A t shirt and a pair of jeans even. Glad your daughter knows how to defend herself.

  24. mouse says:

    I find smart, educated, assertive women to be sexy. But if they are also petite, small busted and wearing a sun dress, I have to avert gaze.

  25. Rick says:

    Believe me when I say there are men who see an attractive women who is dressed in a sexy manner and they take it as an invitation to go beyond “you look pretty today”…

    Okay. There’s also attractive women who throw themselves at anything in pants.

  26. mouse says:

    There’s a talk radio anecdote for every occasion.

  27. Maya says:

    Good for you Rick. All those women throwing themselves at you and leaning over for your pleasure. Like I mentioned previously, if a woman is sexually harassing a man I would back him up 100%. So if all these sexually aggressive women are making you uncomfortable then go report them. I don’t understand what point you are trying to make.

  28. mouse says:

    The 60 year old women at the Rehoboth Art league sometimes act sexually aggressive towards me. I’ll take what I can get these days lol

  29. mouse says:

    And I have been biking through Henlopen Acres hoping to find a retired widdow looking for a boy

  30. Frank Knotts says:

    Again Maya chooses the word sexy when talking about how a woman is dressed. One could contend that dressing “sexy”, is also a behavior, and again, how do we know the woman’s intent?
    Physical contact is one thing and never acceptable. Using one’s authority to force a relationship is never acceptable. When we get into language and comments, a bit of a grey area and depends on how long it went on before the complaint. It should be nipped in the bud the first moment the woman feels uncomfortable.

  31. pandora says:

    Why has this discussion evolved into a discussion of “mutual flirtation” when in 99% of sexual harassment cases the interaction isn’t mutual. It’s unwanted. If a person considers a smile, a blouse, handing someone a folder, leaning over a computer screen, etc as a mutual flirtation then that flirtation lies solely in their head.

    Two women (in the comments above) have shared their experiences as, you know, actual women and no one has addressed a single thing they’ve said. Instead, you guys have switched the conversation to a two person flirtation (which wasn’t the point made). But you guys may have stumbled upon the problem – some of you seem to think that how a woman dresses, moves, smiles, etc. is always personally directed at you. It’s not.

  32. Maya says:

    Thank you Pandora.

  33. Frank Knotts says:

    Pandora, as you are aware, it was a woman who made the accusation that a woman made the decision to dress “sexy”. I simply asked if this choice constitutes mutual responsibility for mixed signals.
    We could also ask about the supposed 99% number. One might assume if a person goes to the point of bringing charges, then it is likely they would naturally say the advances were unwanted, wouldn’t have much of a car otherwise. Hum?

  34. pandora says:

    First, sexy is in the eye of the beholder. There is not one outfit that is universally sexy – which makes almost anything a woman wears open to criticism. I’m beginning to think you (and other commenters) are using the word “sexy” when you really mean “slutty” (vile word). When I read through these comments there’s a sense of: “Well, how does she expect to be treated when dressed like that!” That’s mighty close to burqa territory. It also feeds into the “she was asking for it” trope. It removes all responsibility from the man and places it on the woman.

    Newsflash: It is not a woman’s job to police men’s behavior.

    If a skirt one, two, three, four (pick a number, because it changes depending on the man) inches above the knee turns you on… Control Yourself. That’s your job.

    I’m done with this lazy flirtation argument, btw. It’s simple deflection. Wanna know how I know that? Glad you asked. I know that because not one of you addressed the points in Maya’s first comment. Instead you spun a narrative. Here’s Maya’s first comment:

    Majority of women enjoy and appreciate compliments AND we love having the door held open for us. Majority of woman who actually go as far as to report a sexual harassment situation is because something has gone way further than a nice compliment. Are there idiot, pathological women who lie and try to use sexual harassment to seek revenge of sorts? Of course. But that is not the majority. Ask a woman who has experienced severe sexual harassment or rape and they will tell you of the shaming and doubt put on them by some by coming forward. There are a lot of social consequences women experience when they come forward to report such extreme behaviors, so coming forward is not an easy thing to do. Even in a work situation where there are laws to protect employees, supervisors and fellow employees can view you differently when you report harassment. So that is why majority of women who come forward do so because the behavior has gotten to a point where it is way beyond nice compliments.

    Address the content of that comment and we can have a discussion.

    It’s also funny, on a post titled “Victim Nation”, how quickly (and comfortably) you guys are painting yourselves as victims. Interesting, no?

  35. Frank Knotts says:

    Pandora, your sexism is showing, “There is not one outfit that is universally sexy – which makes almost anything a woman wears open to criticism.” The fact that you seem to think sexual harassment only happens to a woman, perpetrated by a man, is a bit sexist, don’t you think?
    I did not inject the word sexy into the conversation, a woman did, I merely pointed out, if a person dresses in a manner “they” feel is sexy, then they should not be surprised by a sexual response.
    And if their intention was to dress sexy, then they are equally responsible for that response.
    Here again you show a sexist point of view, ” “she was asking for it” trope. It removes all responsibility from the man and places it on the woman.”
    The problem is, far too many people, and society, have decided to place all the responsibility on the man. The man is required to navigate through a mine field of mixed messages, and if he takes even a single misstep, his career, and possibly his personal life could be ruined, simply on the word of the woman.
    Is this the equality so many women fought for? How about this, women dress in the manner they choose, knowing that men may find them attractive, and might make advances. But until said advances rise to the level of unwanted physical contact, no touching allowed, or until their job is threatened, sex or else, or until the language becomes graphic, you know what I would do to you? then as Maya said, put on your big girl pants, take them as compliments.
    But, the double standard has grown to the point at which some, not all, women actually use the threat of sexual harassment to move up, or to take out the competition. Now if you say that never happens, then you are not being honest.
    And please Pandora, don’t attempt to make this a personal conversation by implying I condone sexual harassment, or blame the victims. Let us have an adult conversation about a real issue. Otherwise it’s just Delaware Politics. 😉

  36. pandora says:

    Oh puhlease. Here is exactly what you wrote, Frank: “If a woman brings a sexual harassment charge against a fellow employee, does she consider what it would be like to have the same done to her? No of course not, because the field is not level.” Where is the man in your comment, Frank? Why didn’t you include him? I mean, you’re demanding this of me, right? And yet, in your post, the man is missing. If you wanted a gender neutral discussion, you should have started one.

    And while you’re at it, why not tell me how a woman should dress and what is “sexy” dressing. Be specific.

    One last point… no matter how a woman dresses, smiles, walks, laughs, talks, etc. you are not entitled to her attention.

    And it’s amazing how, in the scenarios you paint, only one gender is a victim of their hormones and utterly clueless and helpless. Is that really how you view your gender? It’s not the way I view men. The men in my life are strong, funny, intelligent, successful across the board and don’t blame confusion or hormones for their inability to control their actions.

  37. Rick says:

    Good for you Rick. All those women throwing themselves at you and leaning over for your pleasure. Like I mentioned previously, if a woman is sexually harassing a man I would back him up 100..

    Who said anything about me? It is universal. Attractive women throwing themselves at men they are attracted to is as old as humanity itself. And I would hardly call it “harassment.”

    The federal government stealing from me to feed lazy bums- that’s harassment.

  38. Frank Knotts says:

    There you go Pandora, making this a personal conversation rather than a intellectual one.
    PUHLEEES don’t act as if my part of the conversation here occurred in a vacuum. Maya was the one who set the scenario with her comment, ” Believe me when I say there are men who see an attractive women who is dressed in a sexy manner”.
    I have simply been reacting to that original point, please follow along, and put you bias on hold.
    You tactics remind me of others, who when asked direct questions, or to respond to specific points, choose to make accusations.
    You are better than that.
    Let me put it this way for you, do you honestly believe that in every case of sexual harassment, regardless of the sex of the victim, there is only one party involved in it reaching a point where a charge is brought?

  39. pandora says:

    I never say never, but you chose to not only completely ignore Maya’s initial comment but seemed to forget that your sudden quest for gender equality wasn’t included in your post. You framed sexual harassment as something a woman does to a man.

    (Btw, sexy wasn’t Maya’s the original point. You ignored her original points.)

  40. Frank Knotts says:

    Thank you Pandora, you have demonstrated perfectly the point of this post. You have played the victim perfectly , making everything someone else’s fault.

  41. pandora says:

    LOL! Know how to tell when Frank has lost an argument? Read his comments above. My pointing out that Frank called out a specific gender in his example isn’t me playing the victim – it’s me pointing out that Frank failed to live up to the standard he set for me. You jumped all over Maya for using the term “sexy” but completely ignore your framing of the issue as a woman (Not a man. Not both genders) crying over sexual harassment.

  42. Frank Knotts says:

    Pandora honey, (oh sorry was that sexist?), you have from the beginning ignored that Maya set the parameters of the conversation about dressing sexy, she made it a woman, not me, which I have pointed out. And why is it that anyone has to “lose” an argument? why can’t we simply have a discussion where we both might learn something?
    But of course to learn, you most have an open mind, which in this case you do not. You refuse to accept that there are times when one person will not accept responsibility for their own actions in a situation.
    You play the victim in this case by crying foul that I won’t discuss this issue in the way you want. Sorry dear, I damn I did it again.

  43. pandora says:

    Calling me “honey” and “dear” only shows your true colors.

    Read your post again. You set the parameters. You said: “If a woman brings a sexual harassment charge against a fellow employee, does she consider what it would be like to have the same done to her? No of course not, because the field is not level.”

    You started this by making this about a woman bringing a sexual harassment claim. You made it gender specific and then you pretend that I am the one ignoring the fact that men can be sexually harassed too.

    Your last sentence concerning an uneven playing field makes no sense when taken in conjunction with your recent comments, because if you are now saying that both men and women do this then that seems like an equal playing field – not a particularly nice playing field, but equal.

    You jumped on Maya’s use of the word “sexy” like you found the Holy Grail – some sort of gotcha moment – and you’ve presented her word choice as proof of… something? I have no idea. Yet you run away from your exact words.

    Sexual Harassment is a serious issue. It is not an office flirtation. It is not playing a victim. And while in every walk of life you’ll encounter dishonest, vengeful people the majority do not lie about this. But that’s really all I get out of this discussion – many of you view women as liars who lash out at men (the true victims) due to spite or just the fun of it.

    Go back and read the comments. No one has even suggested that a man might need to change his behavior, that his “flirting” (eye roll) might be crude and inappropriate, that his jokes cross the line, that his ogling is okay. It’s all a bunch of talk about what she was wearing and how HE thought they were flirting! Why is that?

  44. Frank Knotts says:

    Pandora, you go back and look at the comments, it was Delacrat and Maya who formed the conversation. And why is it, out I all the examples I gave in the post, this one is the only one the ladies here have latched onto? Is it because it hit too close to home?
    As for honey and dear, don’t be an Ayotte, recognize sarcasm.

  45. pandora says:

    Sarcasm? How very Trumpian of you.

    A comment thread is fluid. You fed the first comment with a comment that demonstrated you have no understanding of what sexual harassment consists of (stop blaming other people for behavior you engaged in – you responded to delacrat). You think sexual harassment means paying someone a compliment. It doesn’t, btw.

  46. Rick says:

    You fed the first comment with a comment that demonstrated you have no understanding of what sexual harassment consists of…

    As President, taking advantage of a naive intern under your charge by having her perform sexual favors or, as Governor, instructing state troopers to “escort” a female to a hotel room- is that sexual harassment? No? Then what is?

    All the while, Hapless Hillary impersonates Tammy Wynette….

    “…stand by your man…”

    As the band played on (has Bill booked any more sex flights with underage girls lately?).

  47. Frank Knotts says:

    Pandora, you are correct, the thread is fluid, however go back and check, I responded with a question for clarification.
    And you once again demonstrate my point exactly when you say I have no idea of what sexual harassment consist of. I would contend no one does. Because like the judge once said, “I can’t tell you what pornagraphy is, but I know it when I see it”.
    This is what I mean by mixed messages. Truly only the victims can determine when one thing becomes another, i.e flirtation becomes harassment.
    But in your rush to be the victim and to make me the perpetrator, you lose any sense of objectivity.

  48. pandora says:

    Back to the flirtation nonsense. I’m done here.

  49. mouse says:

    Is it my fault that I find women in sun dresses so sexy that I have to avert my gaze

  50. delacrat says:

    ” Dare I say a female, fellow employee, looks nice today?” – Frank

    “But how is a compliment about how someone looks harassment? “>/i> – Frank

    Frank,

    Consider the context.

    You’re married. You think women co-workers want you “complimenting” their looks ?

  51. Frank Knotts says:

    Well delacrat, again, how is a compliment harassment? Again, the problem is intent. What was the intent of the woman dressing “sexy” as Maya put it. What was the intent of the person making the compliment?
    I see we can’t have an open conversation, since some can’t put their preconceived ideas on hold for even a moment. Pandora has her nose full of stink, and swears it isn’t her. Okay.
    All women are blameless and all men are pigs, happy?
    But can you categorically define what is harassment?

  52. Rick says:

    Back to the flirtation nonsense. I’m done here.

    Why don’t you just submit, and go buy a burka?

  53. mouse says:

    All the women I work with want me to reassure them that I think they are well dressed

  54. Rick says:

    They should wear burkas. Then, nobody will care.

    Do you know why Muslim women wear burkas? Because the men make them wear burkas. You see, in Islamic states, women are basically slaves. They are property. And they can be discarded- even killed- at the whim of men. Stoning is not considered “cruel and unusual punishment.”

    Another odd paradox of Islam is that the men- and the ordained hierarchy- condemn homosexuality, yet practice it with young boys. I guess that doesn’t count.

    In another few decades, the great fashion houses of Paris and Milan will be showing the latest style of burkas. I’m sure they’ll be quite creative with the type of eye slits offered.

    And the bars and sidewalk cafes will be closed, but there will be plenty of establishments where young boys and women can be bought and sold for “personal use.” It is the will of Allah.

  55. delacrat says:

    mouse AUGUST 16, 2016 AT 3:06 PM

    All the women I work with want me to reassure them that I think they are well dressed”

    Rick AUGUST 17, 2016 AT 10:38 AM

    “They should wear burkas.”

    Rick wants mouse’s women co-workers to wear burkas.

  56. Rick says:

    Rick wants mouse’s women co-workers to wear burkas.

    Don’t you ever tire of being simple?

    In any case, the reason Muslim women wear burkas is because the men make them wear them. And a failure to comply may lead to serious consequences. Such as stoning.

    ………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

    For rent;

    Location; Islamabad

    Two camels, a sixteen-year-old girl and an eleven-year-old boy.

    Price negotiable. Will accept discarded wife as partial trade. Call Mohammed.

  57. delacrat says:

    Rick,

    All those little muslims running around inside your head.

    They’re not real.

    Get help.

  58. Rick says:

    They’re not “running around my head.” They’re running around their traditional lair in the Middle East, and now they’re invading Europe. But instead of Charles Martel’s army fighting them at the gates, there’s naive fools like you welcoming them with open arms as Western Civilization crumbles.

    As usual, you divert from my point. Muslim men make Muslim women wear burkas. Muslim men deny women the opportunity for education. Muslim men treat women as property, and can discard their wives as easily as tossing a rotten pomegranate. In many Muslim states, women are bought and sold like goats. The burka represents submission, a cornerstone of Islamic dogma.

    Try addressing that.

  59. mouse says:

    You guys have it tough. On the one hand is Islamic Obama ready to lock you in FEMA camps and forcing you to read science books and the other, Muslim refugees coming for your white women and ready to institute Shira law on your local westen sussex town councils lol.

  60. delacrat says:

    “Muslim men discard their wives as easily as tossing a rotten pomegranate.” – rick

    Kinda like your boy Trump did with Ivana and Marla.

    Try addressing that !

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